my body is history, mythology, fantasy
my hands have dragged sailors to their doom
my feet have danced to sistrums and chanting
my heart beats the blood of every virgin sacrifice
my eyes blink back the blind oracle’s darkness
my voice is the widow’s wail, the daughter’s dirge
the war cry of Sekhmet, the song of Sappho
my warm flesh is priced pound by pound
bathed in milk, in oil, in perfume, in blood
my curves are criminal and coveted
wrapped in silk, in velvet, in gold, in chains
I am carved from marble and painted on tombs
I am burned at the stake and lauded in the brothel
I am subjugated and unbreakable
I am veiled and radiant
I am a sister
born of daughters
born of mothers
born of gods
My religion supports marriage equality. Surprised?
To be more specific, my patron deity supports marriage equality. My goddess is a goddess of joy, of love, of freedom. My goddess is a goddess of equality. My goddess is a goddess of victory.
My goddess is Bast, Lady of the Truth, The Light Bearer, and She celebrates with me today.
Last Saturday I did a tarot reading with Bast and asked Her what the week held for me. The first card She chose was Justice, followed by The Empress. Linking them, the Eight of Wands. Justice, love, and a great journey uniting the two.
I didn’t know what She meant then, but I do now. She was telling me today’s ruling. She was telling me today would be a day of justice, of triumph, of balance and equality. She was telling me we would rejoice today, Her and I both, because She loves me and cherishes my relationship. My love for my girlfriend is beautiful in Bast’s eyes, and when we are happy, She is happy. So today I wear proudly my goddess’s symbols and give my thanks to Her for blessing this joyous ruling.
so today we celebrate
tomorrow we fight
I could weep for joy right now, or scream, or dance (but I’m at work so I won’t). Marriage equality is now the law of the land, and though I’m sure it will still be an uphill battle to enact that law, today is a day for celebration. Today is a day to finally feel safe in my own country. To finally feel accepted. To finally feel valued, equal, wanted. To feel like I can travel outside Washington state without stepping into enemy territory. I know the fight isn’t over. It’s barely begun. But today isn’t the day to overshadow this victory with tomorrow’s worries. Today we celebrate. Today we embrace our freedom, and tomorrow we use it to keep pushing for more. We have won the battle, and we will win the war.
Get ready for some word vomit, ’cause I’m thinking about labels. About the people who say we shouldn’t use them. “Labels are for soup cans” and all of that. Um… no? Labels are descriptors. “Short hair domesticated cat” is a label. “Queer asexual” is a label. “HP Compaq LA2205wg” is a label. You don’t get to determine if labels are important because each label will be important to someone. My vet will care what kind of cat I own. My partner will care about my sexual and romantic orientations. The IT department will care what kind of computer is slowly dying on me. Labels are just words and words are kind of really important for communication and stuff. Without words, without labels, we’re left saying, “Bye honey, I’m going to that place that employs me now.” “That’s my car, the…that one over there.” “Hi, I’m a person. It’s nice to meet you, other person.” Oh, but I guess person is a label too. Well shit. Yeah. You know what count as labels? Adjectives. Occupations. Colors. Emotions. Names. Kingdom. Phylum. Genus. Species. Half of what we say every day probably falls under the label (hah!) of a label, and everything else is filler. So when someone says they don’t believe in labels, they’re not saying they disagree with language in general. That’s just stupid. Who disagrees with having words to explain stuff? No, they’re saying they don’t want to learn new words, because that takes effort, and they don’t care about other people’s labels enough to expend that effort. After all, when was the last time someone said “I don’t believe in labels, so I don’t learn anyone’s names”? “I don’t believe in labels, so I don’t pay attention to street signs”? “I don’t believe in labels, so I call every animal I see a dog”? Just admit it. When you say you don’t believe in labels, you mean you don’t believe someone’s specific label is important enough to use because it’s not directly important to you. Which, you know what? Is selfish. (That’s a label too.) Labels are words, and the more words we have to explain this weird fucking world we live in, the better. If you don’t complain about all the different names for bird species or cities or diseases or religions, you don’t get to complain about the different names for someone’s gender, sexuality, romantic orientation, or anything else that makes that person better understand who they are.
When will the dawning break? Oh endless night Sleepless I dream of the day when you were by my side Guiding my path; Father, I can’t find the way
You promised you’d be there whenever I needed you Whenever I call your name you’re not anywhere
I’m trying to hold on, just waiting to hear your voice One word, just a word will do to end this nightmare
Sometimes I feel like I’m overflowing with all the things I want to tell you. They’ve accumulated over the years, you know? Eight years of stories, questions, secrets, interesting facts and finds. I want to tell you about Rose’s Pawn Shop; I think you’d get a kick out of the fact that my favorite band is a bluegrass band. I want to tell you I ended up majoring in Geoscience and History, not English; would that surprise you, or not? I want to tell you about this Roger Zelazny short story I read – it has the Mary Celeste and the Flying Dutchman in it! I want to tell you about field work in New Mexico, climbing to the base of the Nisqually glacier, studying Japanese biological warfare, and the crazy, wonderful professors who made that all possible. I want to tell you about trying to explain recycling to immigrants from Sudan, Vietnam, Ukraine; I want to tell you about teaching emergency preparedness to children and teenagers and adults. I want to make you see Jurassic World with me, even though we both know it will be awful. I want us to go see Jaws in theaters for its 40th anniversary. I want to tell you I remember the first time we watched that movie, and every movie you ever showed me. I want to tell you I discovered the magic and power of Bradbury too late to discuss him with you, and I’ll always regret that. I want to tell you I’ve finally fallen in love, and I know you’d like her, and I know you’d be happy for us. I want to tell you I look at time differently now, and relationships, and life. I want to tell you we’re okay, but we miss you terribly, and things can’t ever be the same.
I know that the night must end And that the sun will rise, and that the sun will rise
I know that the clouds must clear And that the sun will shine, and that the sun will shine
I know that the night must end I know that the sun will rise And I’ll hear your voice deep inside